Children who have struggled in school quickly lose confidence. Perhaps you have seen your child on this downhill slide?
Logic is not effective for gaining confidence. You can talk to them about the situation. That, of course, is a good thing to do. But it won't build confidence.
Kids build confidence from succeeding at the tasks they take on. If their confidence is low they will avoid taking on tasks. Because of this, they will not build confidence. It's a vicious circle.
Ancient Ways And Modern Neuroscience
There are a number of strategies that are built into the Learning Success System that are specifically designed to build confidence. Let's talk about the most important of those strategies.
The concept has been around for a long time. In Japanese culture, it is called Kaizen. The concept has been used throughout Asian cultures and especially in intensive martial arts training. Phil and Liz Weaver, the founders of the Learning Success System, hold multiple black belts in Kung Fu. They each taught professionally for over 20 years. So they are both masters of motivating and building confidence. Those same principles used to teach the most sophisticated of arts are built into the Learning Success System to help kids build confidence, overcome procrastination, and become disciplined learners.
What is kaizen?
Well, it's very simple actually. It's setting the student up for small successes. The goal is to build as many wins in as possible. The size of the win does not matter. It's the number of wins.
So if something is not working you break it down into smaller pieces. If it still isn't working you break it down even smaller. For example, if you want to get in shape do not commit to doing a long run every day. Only commit to exercising for one minute. It's such a tiny commitment that the brain won't rebel. This works extremely well with kids who are already showing signs of avoidance. You simply back up and design the lessons to get the small wins. Because it doesn't matter how small they are. If you can get wins you will progress to bigger and better things.
What's interesting is that neuroscience has just recently proven the validity of the method. Martial artists have been using the method for hundreds, if not thousands of years. Now we know why it works.
Neuroscientists did brain scans and found that small wins released the pleasure neurotransmitters. The size of the win had no bearing on the amount released. It was the number.
It then becomes like an addiction, but a good one. The brain seeks out those good feeling neurotransmitters. It knows it gets them from successes. Do this enough and learning becomes fun and exciting. As a matter of fact, this is a part of the reason why learning is fun. If it's not fun something is wrong. And if something is wrong you fix that with the kaizen process.
Once learning becomes fun for your child again then it's only natural that your relationship will become better with your child. You will also have more free time as the avoidance tactics go away.
How would that feel? More time and a more enjoyable relationship with your child.
Learn all the tactics we use to build confidence.
